The Value of Friendship

George Elliot writes, "Friendship is the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words."

How wonderful it is to have a friend with whom you feel safe being yourself, not needing to seek approval or feel pressured to be who they want you to be.

Psychologist Marisa Franco writes about the importance of friends in her book “Platonic.” Platonic relationships are built on mutual trust, shared interests, and emotional support. Romantic intimacy is not a key factor, but having an equally bonded friendship is.

Why do we find it challenging to form friendships as adults?

Marisa explains the ‘paradox of people.’ We know we need people to help us feel connected, but they can also emotionally wound or reject us. How we handle this paradox impacts our ability to maintain healthy friendships. She also discusses a phenomenon called the “liking gap,” in which people underestimate how much someone likes them at their first meeting. The results of this research suggest that we're less likely to be rejected than we think. Another observation was that people who think friendships will happen with luck are actually lonelier five years later. Those who are prepared to put in the effort to connect with others are less lonely.

Research reveals that loneliness is more toxic for your body than a poor diet or not exercising.  

Forming friendships can feel vulnerable, but if we want to connect with people, 

we need to resist the part of ourselves that is fearful or mistrustful. When we allow the part of ourselves that wants to feel connected to be present in our interactions, we can form new friendships with renewed confidence and success.

AI chatbot: The illusion of a friend

“AI offers a friction-free pseudo-relationship,” Dr. Sherry Turkle (Sociologist).

People feeling lonely or isolated can become emotionally attached to an online connection wth a machine trained to interact like a human. AI platforms can be a useful source of information, providing support for friendship connections. But AI conversations cannot replace real- life human interactions.

To experience the fullness of who we are, it can be beneficial to have a community of friendships -  maybe including a romantic connection, interest groups, fitness buddies, business colleagues, and pets. All have significance in adding value to our lives.

Enjoy quality time with friends, your wellbeing will thank you: mind, body, and soul Trish